How to Use a Sex Machine: A Complete Beginner’s Guide

Sex machines can look intimidating at first. Big, loud, complicated, and a little like something you’re only supposed to understand if you’re a pro or a porn star. Feeling curious and nervous at the same time is completely normal. Most people aren’t looking for hype or fantasy.

They just want straight answers about how to use a sex machine without hurting themselves, getting overwhelmed, or feeling awkward.

This is for beginners, solo users who want a hands-free toy, and couples who want to explore something new together. It’s for men, women, and anyone in between who wants more control over their own pleasure. The goal is simple: understand how to use a sex machine safely, choose settings that make sense, avoid common mistakes, and actually enjoy the experience without pressure.

Table of Contents

• What Is a Sex Machine? (Quick, Simple Explanation)
• Safety First: How to Use a Sex Machine Without Hurting Yourself
• Preparing for Your First Session
• Lubrication: The Most Important Beginner Skill
• Suggested Beginner Positions (Simple, Stable, Low-Stress)
• Beginner Mistakes and How to Avoid Them
• Using a Sex Machine With a Partner
• Aftercare Steps & Why It Matters
• Types of Sex Machines
• Frequently Asked Questions
• Final Thoughts: Confidence, Curiosity, and Control
• Want More Reads?

What Is a Sex Machine? (Quick, Simple Explanation)

Credit: Lovense ~ sex machine and mini sex machine

With advances in sex tech, the idea of what counts as a “sex machine” has loosened a lot. There are still the traditional, heavy-duty machines with frames and arms, but there are also newer options that blur the line, like powerful thrusting dildos. Different shapes, sizes, and styles exist now, but they all work on the same core idea.

A sex machine is a motor-powered toy that moves for you. Instead of pushing something in and out by hand, the machine handles the motion. That can mean thrusting, vibration, or a mix of both. Speed, depth, and sometimes angle are controlled by settings. Hands stay free, and the movement stays consistent for as long as it’s turned on.

They will have some variation of:

• Base: A heavy, stable section that sits on the floor, bed, or table. It holds the motor and keeps the machine from sliding, tipping, or shaking during use.
• Frame or Arm: The moving section that drives the motion. It pushes the attachment back and forth and/or controls the angle and thrust depth. Some machines let this part stay adjustable; others keep it fixed.
• Attachment: This is the part that makes contact with the body. This might be a dildo, sleeve, vibrating head, sleeve, etc. Some machines allow attachments to be swapped to change size, shape, or feel.
• Controls: They can be buttons, dials, a remote, or a phone app. They manage speed, thrust depth, vibration, and different motion patterns.

Safety First: How to Use a Sex Machine Without Hurting Yourself

A sex machine keeps going at the same power until you stop it. That’s part of the appeal, but it also means you’re fully responsible for pacing, comfort, and safety. It helps to think of a sex machine less like a toy and more like a piece of gym equipment designed for pleasure – you wouldn’t jump straight to full speed on a new machine without warming up or learning how it moves. The same logic applies here.

• Start at the lowest speed and shallowest depth.
• Give your body time to adjust to the rhythm and angle before changing anything.
• Once it feels comfortable, increase speed or depth gradually.
• With a motor doing the work, small changes matter more than you expect.
• Going straight to maximum power is a common way to turn pleasure into discomfort.

Stability is also important. If the machine slides or tips, the angle can change suddenly. Set it on a flat, non-slip surface and use mats, towels, suction bases, or bracing if needed. The goal is simple: the base stays still so the motion stays predictable.

Also, before using the machine, learn how to stop it quickly. You should know where the power button is, if there’s an emergency stop, and how an additional remote or app shuts it all down.

And remember…

Vaginal use is generally more forgiving but still needs lubricant, warm-up, and a slow start. Anal play needs extra care. The anus doesn’t self-lubricate and takes longer to relax, so use plenty of lube, start with a smaller attachment, and keep the speed low. Never force penetration. If you’re new to anal play, get comfortable with a finger or small plug before using a thrusting machine.

Pressure and stretching can feel intense. Sharp pain, burning, or numbness are signs to stop. Turn the machine off, breathe, and adjust the angle, speed, or attachment size. There’s no benefit to pushing through discomfort. Safety isn’t restrictive. It’s what makes longer, better, and more enjoyable sessions possible.

Preparing for Your First Session

Credit: Himsmith thrusting sex machines

A good first experience isn’t about fancy positions or wild settings. It’s about feeling relaxed, supported, and in control.

Choosing the Right Space

Pick a place where you can move around easily and won’t feel rushed or self-conscious. A bedroom or living room with a flat, stable surface works best – tiles and wood are your best friends for suction cup bases. You want enough room to adjust the machine, change your position, and reach the controls without stretching or twisting. Privacy helps too. Knowing you won’t be interrupted lets your body relax.

What to Have Ready

• Towels protect your sheets and give you something soft to sit or kneel on. They also make cleanup easier.
• Remote or app should be fully charged and within reach. Nothing kills the mood like hunting for a control button.
• Water keeps you hydrated. Sex machines can be surprisingly physical, and you’ll feel better if you take a sip when you need it.
• Pillows are your secret weapon. They help support your hips, back, and chest so you don’t strain or get sore.

Testing Controls Before You Start

Your first time won’t be glamorous – it will be about learning and fine-tuning. You’ll have to stop, adjust, and start a few times until you find the right speeds, angles, etc. In fact, the first time you turn it on, you should still be fully clothed – run through the speeds, change thrust depth, go through vibrations (if they have them), and adjust angles.

Choosing a Beginner-Friendly Attachment

Start smaller and softer than you think you need. Slim, smooth attachments are easier for your body to relax around and feel more forgiving while you’re learning. Big, textured, or extra firm attachments can wait until you know what you enjoy and how the machine feels.

Why Warm-Up Matters

An automatic sex machine isn’t foreplay. It’s the main event. Spend a few minutes getting yourself turned on before you use it. Touch, breathe, relax, and let your body soften. When you’re already aroused, the machine feels exciting. When you’re not, it can feel too strong, too fast.

Lubrication: The Most Important Beginner Skill

Credit: Source Unknown

As mentioned before, sex lube isn’t optional here. It’s what keeps everything smooth, comfortable, and actually enjoyable.

• Water-based lube is the safest choice. It works with silicone attachments, it’s easy to clean, and it won’t damage your toy.
• Use more than you think you need.
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  Coat both your body and the attachment generously. You can always wipe off extra, but stopping mid-session because things feel dry is no fun.
• Reapply when things stop feeling slick. Long sessions dry lube out. If it starts to feel sticky or draggy, pause and add more.
• Avoid oils, lotions, or household substitutes. They can damage toys and irritate sensitive skin.

Suggested Beginner Positions (Simple, Stable, Low-Stress)

Credit: Lauvette (another excellent article, btw)

Flat on Your Back

This is usually the easiest place to start, especially if you’re new. Lying flat lets your body fully relax and keeps your spine and hips naturally aligned. Because you’re supported by the surface beneath you, it’s easier to notice how depth and speed feel and adjust them without tension. It’s also a good position before experimenting with angles or intensity.

Supported Kneeling / Leaning Forward

Kneeling with pillows under your hips, thighs, or chest gives you more control over angle without forcing your body to hold its own weight. The extra support reduces strain on your lower back and knees while still allowing subtle shifts forward or back. This position works well if you want to fine-tune depth or pressure gradually rather than relying on speed.

Edge of Bed or Chair

Positioning yourself at the edge of a bed or chair allows the machine to sit in front of or behind you with minimal effort from your body. Because your weight is mostly supported, it’s easier to stay relaxed and maintain a consistent position. This setup also makes it simple to step away or stop quickly if you need to adjust something.

Side-Lying

Side-lying is a gentler option, especially for slower sessions or sensitive bodies. With pressure spread along your side and hips, fatigue builds more slowly and there’s less stress on joints. The angle tends to be softer and more controlled, which can make this position feel calmer and more sustainable over longer periods.

Low Straddle (Ride-On Machines)

With ride-on machines, sitting or kneeling low with your feet firmly on the floor gives you the most direct control. Your legs help stabilize your body, and small shifts in posture change depth and pressure without needing higher speeds.

Beginner Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

• Going too fast too soon – High settings feel tempting, but motors amplify intensity quickly.
• Skipping foreplay – Using a machine on an unaroused body can feel abrupt or uncomfortable.
• Using the wrong attachment size – Starting too large or intense often leads to discomfort. Smaller, simpler attachments are easier to control and better for learning.
• Forgetting to breathe and relax – Tension makes sensations harsher. Steady breathing and a relaxed posture help everything feel smoother and more enjoyable.
• Expecting instant orgasms – A sex machine isn’t a shortcut. Focusing on sensation and control usually leads to better experiences than chasing a fast result.

Using a Sex Machine With a Partner

Using a sex machine together works best when it feels like something you’re exploring as a team. One person relaxes into the sensations while the other takes control, and that simple shift can make the experience feel more intimate and playful instead of mechanical.

Some options come with an extra remote, and handing that control to your partner can be surprisingly exciting. You both stay connected through touch, eye contact, and small reactions. A quick check-in before you start about what feels good and what’s off limits keeps everything relaxed and safe. Also, while the machine handles the movement, your partner is free to do the human part. Kissing, touching, oral, holding you close, whispering, or just staying present with you.

Some machines even allow long-distance control through an app, so a partner can guide the session from anywhere while you talk or video chat. It’s a simple way to stay connected and playful when you’re apart, and a reminder that the machine isn’t replacing intimacy, it’s expanding it – this is a win for long-distance relationships.

Aftercare Steps & Why It Matters

• Hydration: Sex machines are more physical than they seem and can leave you tired or light-headed. Drink water right after your session and again later if you feel dry or sluggish.
• Peeing After Penetrative Play: Helps flush bacteria from the urethra and lowers the risk of UTIs. Go to the bathroom within 15–30 minutes after using the machine.
• Soothing Irritation: Repeated motion can leave tissue feeling sensitive or tender. Rinse with warm water, apply a gentle, fragrance-free soothing gel if needed, and rest.
• Emotional Check-Ins: Intense pleasure can bring up unexpected feelings. This is normal. Take a moment to notice how you feel and talk with your partner if anything comes up.

Aftercare isn’t just for BDSM. It helps your body and mind settle after intense stimulation. Slow down, breathe, relax, and treat your body kindly before jumping back into your day.

Types of Sex Machines

These are “machine gun” versions – 99% of the time, they’re relabeled white brands and poor quality

Sex Machine CategoryDescriptionThrusting Sex MachinesMotorized machines that drive a mounted dildo or sleeve in a linear in-and-out motion. Speed and depth are usually adjustable.Saddle Sex MachinesBuilt to be sat on or straddled, with thrust and pressure controlled mainly by body movement rather than speed alone.Floor-Standing Sex MachinesLarge, heavy units designed to sit on the floor with high stability and strong motors.Mounted Sex MachinesMachines designed to clamp, bolt, or brace against furniture for elevated positioning.Portable Sex MachinesSmaller, lighter machines that still use a motorized thrust system but with reduced power.App-Controlled Sex MachinesMachines operated via phone or remote, allowing fine control and preset patterns.Non-Motorized Sex MachinesMechanical frames that rely on body movement instead of motors. Like monkey rockers.

Frequently Asked Questions

Final Thoughts: Confidence, Curiosity, and Control

Using a sex machine isn’t something you’re supposed to be instantly perfect at. It’s a skill you learn, one small adjustment at a time, and that’s part of the fun. The best experiences come from slowing down, listening to your body, and giving yourself space to explore without pressure.

There’s no “right way” to feel pleasure and no finish line you have to race toward. What matters is that you stay curious, stay in control, and let your comfort guide you. When you do that, a sex machine stops being intimidating and starts feeling like what it really is: a powerful tool for discovering what your body enjoys.

Want More Reads?

• Spinel vs. Sybian: How to Tell Which Machine Matches Your Style
• Lovense Mini Sex Machine Review: Little Package, Huge Sensations
• How to Build DIY Sex Machines: Step-by-Step Guides & Tips